Hello, my name is Skeezix-Badass Triathlete

First let me start off by saying that on Friday night the plan was to have one drink with friends to unwind and somehow I ended up drunkity drunk drunk. And my sister totally busted me by calling me at the bar and saying "You said ONE! How did you drink 4!?"

I blame triathlon stress. Yes. For sure. Blame the triathlon.

Ok, peeps, here is my super nerdy recap:

The morning of the race (Sunday- plenty of time to recover from Friday's silliness) was nice and overcast, around 66 degrees. I got up at 5:10 because the race started at 7:30 and I wanted to be there by 6:15 to rack my bike and get my gear laid out.

Before the race I had a lot of water (I'd started hydrating the night before) a banana, one egg with a slice of cheese and a Cliff Mojo bar.

I decided for the swim portion to swim in my sports bra and tri shorts, and then pull on my tri top with my number pinned on for the bike and run. Everyone at the race site was so helpful, and I have to admit I loved being body marked- it made me feel like a real triathlete since the body marking is always noticeable in photos I've looked at.

The swim portion was a self seeding single start, with the swimmers going into the water in three second intervals. There was 9 minutes and under, 10-13 minutes, and 14 and up for the timed sections. I placed myself in the 10-13 minute group figuring that I'd do the swim portion in about 11-12 minutes. There was a lot of chatting among the triathletes, one woman standing next to me was celebrating her 55th birthday that day. How awesome is that?

So eventually it was my turn to get into the quarry for the swim, there were three steps down into the water and then a 25-ft drop to the bottom of the quarry. Which was great because there was no wading threw sand or mud, just straight on swimming. So I dove right in, and then started passing people left and right. I was most confident about the swimming portion because I've been a swimmer since I was a child (and competitive one until I graduated high school). The water was the perfect temp, it was warm but not too warm. Before I knew it was I approaching the first buoy and did some breast stroke to really get some good deep breaths and then made the turn around the buoy and pulled back into a front crawl. I felt like I was flying through the water and before I knew it I was at the finish and slogging up the 30 some steps out of the quarry/swim portion and into my transition.

I ran to my bike rack, I had counted how many bike racks I would pass before I reached mine before the race so that made it really easy to locate my stuff, and dried off my feet and started to pull on my tri top. Well, tried to pull on my tri top- it kept getting stuck on my wet sports bra. HA! That was a failure in the part of my planning. Once I finally got it on I pulled on my socks and shoes and helmet and took off on the bike. I was not prepared for the how much the first 3 miles of the bike would make me want to die. I'm a decent bike (albeit a slow biker) but for some reason those first three miles were torture. In my head I could hear myself saying 'why the hell did you think you could do this?' and 'man, I don't know if I can make it' but I kept peddling (and getting passed a lot) and by the time I make the second turn in the course I felt better. I just settled into my rhythm and told myself to screw any preconceived notions about what speed I should be clipping along at and just keep peddling. The second loop of the bike course was a bit easier- but again there was just one section that felt like it went on forever and ever but this time I knew there was eventually going to be a turn and that I could make it. I really do need a different bike though, I've got a hybrid bike (at least that is what the bike shop called it when I bought it 3 years ago). It is great for tooling around town and whatever but it is entirely too heavy and I really felt like I was dragging it behind me as I biked. I definitely see a new bike in my future.

So I finally approached the end of the bike section and quickly re-racked my bike and whipped off my helmet and set out for the run.

I had been practicing my bike to run transitions so that went super smoothly and I knew what to expect from my legs, and lightly jogged for a little bit. And then I needed to walk a good bit because I had to pee so bad and it physically hurt to run with a full bladder. Luckily about a 3/4 of a mile into the course were some bathrooms so I quickly hit up those and felt instantly better. I did a good bit of slow jogging because running in the hardest part of the whole thing for me, and little bit of walking. The best part of it was when this woman came up from behind me and we were about to turn onto the grass to run for a bit and she was hilarious. She started yelling to me about how good it felt to be on the grass and then (she's still behind me at this part) yells "Oh my god, you're a swimmer aren't you?" And I said yes, and reduce my pace a bit to let her catch up to me, then she said "I could totally tell from behind because of your tight little athletic body!" and then we ran along together talking for a bit. She had a great pace and looking back I wished I decided to keep up with her but I needed to walk a bit because of a cramp in my glut.

Finally I came around the corner to the finish line and was so damn happy. It was great because as you crossed the finish line they had music playing and an announcer calling out your name. I had a great big smile across my face as I hit the finish line and the announcer commented on it. It was great! I felt fantastic! And really except for those few miles of the bike that were painfully rough I thought it wasn't too bad. I was wickedly slow and am looking to improve but I know I can do it now and will get better.

These are approximate, except for the swim because I was most proud of that and memorized my time. They've yet to get the results up on the web so I'll edit it as soon as I know for sure the official times:

Swim: 7m 42sec
T1: 3m 42sec
Bike: 1hr 5 m
T2: 43 sec
Run: 45 min

Overall time: 2 hours 5 minutes

I really think that the Elite Endevours/Toledo Triathlon group did a fantastic job. Everything was well marked and their constant shouts of encouragement really kept up my moral on the course. Afterwards one of the volunteers came up to me and grabbed my hands and told me I did a amazing job and that I was such a strong powerful woman and he saw me on the course working my tail off. I felt fantastic. I also thought it was great that whenever you passed someone who was doing the course or they passed you- you shouted words of encouragement at each other. I wasn't expecting that but it helped and really made me feel some sort of connection to the other racers. Uh, that might sound really corny but whatever.

It is definitely one of the best days of my life EVER.

And I'm so doing another one.

Ok, photos- I've only got mine and I'm sure I'll bombard you guys with more when I get them from my mom and then the professionals who took some too:

T1: Swim to Bike

Second Lap of the bike:

Coming into T2: bike to run transition:

Approaching the finish line after the run:

Dorktastic photo of me:

Hauling ass towards the finish line!

Mom and I post race, look how red I am!

They marked the age you'd be on Dec. 31st on your calf:

And my awesome guns sporting my race number (hahaha!)

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July Cooking Club

It was fantastic, I hosted at my new house and made my guests bring their own chairs because I own exactly 2! chairs.

But the weather was perfect, it was cool with just a slight breeze and sunny. And the food. Oh my lord, the food. To me this was probably the best cooking club we've ever had.

Summer made watercress and watermelon salad, it was perfect. Deliciously light and the crisp watermelon contrasted so wonderfully with the sharp tang of the gorganzola. I went back for thirds:


Serves 4

2 cups medium diced seedless watermelon
1/4 cup toasted walnuts
3 bunches watercress greens, ends trimmed
1/4 cup Gorgonzola cheese, crumbled

Honey Orange Vinaigrette
1/2 cup fresh orange juice
1/2 tsp. minced garlic
2 tbsp. honey
1/2 tsp. chopped fresh mint
14 cup apple cider vinegar
3/4 cup canola oil
1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
Salt and pepper to taste

Dressing: Whisk all ingredients except oils, salt and pepper in a small bowl. Combine olive and canola oils and while whisking, slowly pour into orange juice mixture. Season with salt and pepper and set aside. To serve: In another bowl, combine watermelon, nuts and watercress. Add just enough dressing to coat the greens. Serve topped with cheese.

- Substitute watercress for mixed greens, just as good.
- Use 1/2 or less of canola oil, the dressing comes out a bit tangier.

Yumi made a delicious grilled eggplant salad. The eggplant, which is already a favorite of mine, was paired with smooth and mellow goat cheese and pine nuts. I was heartily tempted to steal the entire plate and crouch in the corner calling it 'my precious' while devouring it and not sharing at all.

Grilled Eggplant and Goat Cheese Salad
Recipe courtesy Giada De Laurentiis

3 tablespoons olive oil
7 Japanese eggplant, ends trimmed, cut into 1-inch wide slices
1/2 cup toasted pine nuts
3 ounces goat cheese, crumbled
1/3 cup basil, thinly sliced
2 tablespoons chopped mint
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
3 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Place a grill pan over medium-high heat or preheat a gas or charcoal grill. Drizzle the olive oil over the slices of eggplant and toss to coat. Grill the eggplants until tender and grill marks appear, about 3 to 4 minutes per side.

Place the eggplants side-by-side on a serving platter. Sprinkle with the pine nuts, goat cheese, basil, and mint. Drizzle with extra-virgin olive oil, balsamic vinegar, salt, and pepper.

The main course was grilled pizzas, which if you've never had them are the most amazing fantastic way to eat pizza. The crust gets unbelievably crispy and the toppings melt perfectly. It really will ruin you for most other styles of pizza. Don't be afraid of making the dough yourself, it really is alarmingly easy. Plus if you practice your in-the-air-tossing technique your guests will be appropriatedly amazed and you will forever be considered awesome.

Toppings of course can be your favorite, these were all delicious and I highly recommend using fresh mozzerella because their really is nothing better.

Half a grilled pizza with the eggplant salad and half with basil and fresh mozzerella:

Olive oil, fresh basil, fresh tomato and fresh mozzerella make this one our hands down favorite:

And then my other personal favorite bacon and pineapple with fresh mozzerella. I know most people go for the ham with pineapple but really I enjoy the extra salty kick the bacon lends which is the perfect compliment to the sweet pineapple:

Grilled Fanastic Pizza


1 tablespoon active dry yeast
6 cups high gluten flour (I like King Arthur Flour)
2 teaspoons kosher salt
Extra virgin olive oil

I do mine on a grill, but you can do it in the oven.

Sprinkle the yeast over 1/2 cup warm (105 to 110 degrees) water and allow it to

dissolve and activate, about 5 minutes. Combine the flour and salt and mound it onto a cool work surface creating a high walled well in the center.

Combine the yeast mixture with 1 1/2 cups of cool water and pour into the well. Slowly begin to mix the water and flour, a little at a time, moving your fingers in short, coun-ter clockwise circles around the border of the water.

When the dough is firm enough to hold its shape, scrape the remaining flour over it and knead until the mass is smooth and shiny, approximately 7 minutes.

Transfer the dough to a bowl that has been brushed with olive oil. Brush the top of the dough with olive oil to prevent a skin from forming, cover the bowl with plastic wrap, and let rise in a warm place away from drafts until doubled in bulk, about 2 hours. Punch down the dough and knead once more. Let the dough rise again for about 40 minutes, punch down again and form into dough balls.

Roll out the dough (approx o inch thick) and coat with olive oil. Place on wax paper and coat top with olive oil (be generous) cover with another sheet of wax paper. Repeat with the rest of the dough, stacking them as you go.

Heat grill to medium (or medium low- depending on how hot your grill gets).

Remove pizza from the wax paper (remember it needs to be coated well with olive oil) place on grill. Let it get a nice set of grilled marks on it and then flip with a spatula.

Add sauce, cheese and toppings. Close grill cover and allow to cook until the some of the cheese just starts to melt, the underside of the pizza should be golden brown and have some nice grilled lines on it. Remove from grill, the rest of the cheese will melt after removing it from the grill.

Cut into slices and serve.

And to end the night on a sweet note Nancy brought fresh berries dressed simply in homemade lemoncello, mint and basil. It was the perfect finish to the evening.

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Best Email Ever

To: Skeezix
From: Kate

I had a set of things to bring you last night! I was going to bring you your pie plate and a tupperware and freaks and geeks.I had your penis cupcake pan to give back, but now Ashton Kutcher is borrowing it.

Edited to add a photo of Ashton playing cornhole at 4th of July party I was at:


Who the fuck gets a sore throat and plugged ears in the middle of July?


You got to be fucking kidding me, right? It seriously fucked my week, and that is not good- I need to perfectly 100% healthy for my goddamn triathlon next week.

Speaking of the triathlon, I feel like I'm going to suck it. Also, my swim suit that I had planned on wearing is aparently completely see through so now I have to buy a new suit- one that doesn't show my ass to all the world.

Which is stressing me out because I feel perpetually short on cash lately. Going to the doctor and getting a perscription filled cost me an extra $30 I wasn't planning on spending on random illness crap. Oh and that motherfucking evil iTunes is taunting me with the music I want to purchase just sitting in my shopping cart screaming: BUY ME!

Yes, I just need the Paul Oakenfold remix of Elvis Presley singing Rubberneckin'.

Don't you judge me.


Lets do a quick recap of my awesome weekend (which was so much better than my super lame week):

In an effort to pick ourselves out of the boring workweek hole Yumi and I decided to get fancied up and go out. We played the most awesome game of darts ever played by either of us, never in my life have I ever played that well. At the next bar we ran into a friend of ours who brought his own boombox into the bar.

Yes, he brought his own party mix on a boombox into a bar. Because he is awesome.

In between bands he busted it out and we danced around like fools. I do believe one guy was laughing at us since we were rockin' out to some totally hilarious 80's music. I really need to get that mix from him, because it was the best I've heard in a while.

After that it was pretty close to closing time, and another friend of mine offered to walk me home. We then killed a bottle of wine on my patio and finally I think we fell asleep around 5:30?

I've had more late nights in the last 7 months than I did the whole time I was in college. I'm not sure what that says about me and my friends though, perhaps we are regressing?

Saturday was devoted to sleeping in and awesomely having no hangover, the farmer's market and napping.

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Dear attractive man at the gym,

So were you looking at me? Perhaps you just kept turning your head to see the clock? Or perhaps wonder why in the hell someone with small ears would even attempt to wear over-the-ear-earphones?

Really, when I took the headphones off it was your cue to say hello-if indeed you had been trying to flirt with me. I guess I won't know though because you got off the elipitical to get a drink of water and then that overly blond, overly skinny woman took your place.

If you were checking me out, please say hello to me. I'd date you.

-The redfaced, sweaty girl


Eight random things about me since I was tagged by Amblus.

1. I love starlight mints. I have them in my purse, my desk, my car and my house.

2. I often fantasize about quitting my job and taking up one of the following professions: masseuse, manicurist, OB/GYN, potter, baker, person who restores old houses, a fiction writer, cookbook author, or a cooking teacher.

3. I collect martini glasses yet rarely drink martinis. Perhaps I should institute a new drink policy in my house?

4. I wear a claddagh ring my grandparents gave me from their last trip to Ireland.

5. I read romance novels.

6. My one niece will occasionally refer to me as 'Little Mommy'.

7. I like going to the movies by myself. I don't have to share my popcorn or my drink and I can sit anywhere I like without having to take into consideration the other person's seating preferences.

8. I'm a total froufy-frouf-frouf girl sometimes. I do face masks, pedicures and manicures on a weekly basis. Plus I wax and tweeze my eye brows and I love to play with makeup and wear dresses. But I also have no problem leaving the house in a t-shirt and jeans with my hair pulled back and no makeup (uh, which is exactly how I'm dressed at work today).


Photographic evidence

So Friday was matching dress night and somehow we all became camera whores.


Conjoined Twins:

Yumi and I a wee bit intoxicated:

Pretending to touch and admire the art work:

We decided that each side of the table should pretend to swim (yes, we were that blotto):

Summer decided to go to her car and get her rollerblades to skate around the bar.

Conjoined Twins, laughing it up and I expose my bra:

Dancing on a tabletop, does that ever not sound like a good idea?

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Oh my.

So last friday's sparkly feeling led to drunken hijinks which included me pouring some of my water onto a friend's pants while we were still sitting at the bar.

And only baby Jesus and the 5 beers I'd previously had know why.