nothing of consequence Sunday, January 25, 2009I've been seriously boring lately. I've not gone out in weeks, preferring instead to hide from the sub-zero temps by spending ungodly amounts of time squirreled away inside my apartment. Inside, where I'm either staring blankly at the TV or cooking. I think there is some sort of disastrous disconnect in my brain that causes me to forget entirely that I'm one person and end up cooking for about a family of 45. So then I've got entire pans of chicken enchiladas and double batches of Swedish meatballs. Ridiculous.
In good news though I finally finished a blanket I started working on when I was a junior in college. Finish is entirely subjective though because the yarn I bought, lo those 8 years ago, has gone missing. Pth! So I just bound off the edge and considered it done. And since I've finished it I've found it to be the perfect couch companion. It's exceedingly warm and perfect for snuggling under since it is so freaking enormous (originally slated to fit a queen sized bed).
This following bit is stolen from my facebook, but since it took me over a whole day to write I felt it should get a bit more mileage. Also, have I mentioned sometimes I'm epically lazy?
So 25 things about me:
1. I occasionally can be a horrible procrastinator, this is a perfect example considering I got tagged over a week ago.
2. I love a good dirty martini with a shot of hot sauce. Or a glass of bourbon. Or a Bombay Sapphire and tonic.
3. I could easily spend days knitting and being completely happy doing so.
5. Yellow roses are my favorite, hydrangeas are a close second, peonies are third.
6. I have deep and abiding love of good corned beef. A good reuben (with sour cream and mustard instead of thousand island) might be the most perfect food in the world.
7. I could easily spend the GDP of a small ex-U.S.S.R state on makeup and other skin care items from Sephora.
8. I miss playing softball.
9. When I was about 8 I was in a grade school talent show. I've blocked most of it from my memory but do recall there were very sparkly tights, big hair and a choreographed dance routine involving bouncing a basketball.
10. My two favorite books are Pride and Prejudice and East of Eden.
11. I hate eHarmony commercials. I want to throw a lamb shank at those overly happy, smug couples.
12. I want a dog.
13. When I was a little girl I had to wear braces on my legs to correct my walking. I shared an orthopedist with the Cleveland Browns. This makes me feel special.
14. My grandparents gave me a claddagh ring for my Confirmation and a few months later I lost it when I was playing hide and seek in a cornfield. I felt awful about it because I loved that ring, luckily the next time they went to Ireland they bought me another one and I hate to admit I like the second one better than the first. It's prettier.
15. I hate it when people call me Susan or Suzy. Yet I let my Grandmother get away with calling me Suzy, only because she is very old.
16. I remember Sr. Nancy who taught American History would let Katie M and I talk all the time in class and never yelled at us for it. She sure did yell at Devon for telling us to be quiet.
17. Thinking of 25 things has been immensely hard.
18. I'm wickedly allergic to cigarette smoke.
19. I still love the times I had in Apartment #2. The Bitchin' Bitchass Bar was the best home bar ever. It was totally Ro-bitchin'.
20. Apartment #2 had two squirrels that lived on our back porch, we named them Gwen and Ron. Ron fell into our keg bucket and drowned. We felt really bad about that as we dumped him over our porch railing to his final resting place on the roof of the house below us.
21. I love trashy romance novels, especially if they are British period ones.
22. I love to shit talk and am very competitive. Consider that fair warning.
23. I've been weirdly obsessed with the idea of living in Wisconsin for long time. I think it is the availability of cheese curds and lots of breweries.
24. Currently I only have 5 minutes of hot water, my landlord is sending someone out to fix that this next week. Thank god.
25. Even though I don't go out without sunscreen my freckles have suddenly reappeared after having been missing for nearly a decade. I love them.
And the morning was total crap. Thursday, January 08, 2009Scene: You sick on the couch when you realize you'd promised to pick up a coworker at the car repair shop. Hop crazily around apartment like someone is continually sticking you with a cattle prod. Can't find a damn bra at all. Seriously, where the fuck are all my bras?!
Oh, an ice storm has frozen your driver's side door is totally frozen shut and won't unlock. Use passenger side door to crawl in and start car. Fuck with the driver's side from the inside, still won't open. Frantically try to scrape ice off of car, you are seriously spazzing out. Flailing about wildly that becomes even more pronounced when you realized you've locked your keys in the running car. SOB. House is locked too.
Walk over to the concrete company and beg them to use the phone while cursing yourself for not hiding those spare keys you had made last week. Call coworker and tell her you won't be able to pick her up. Call locksmith.
At that point you just decide to fuck it all and stay home.
Make yourself hot toddies. Whiskey and tea make things better.
New Years, same old feelings. Thursday, January 01, 2009It's the new year and we all know how I feel about this particular holiday (hate it) and how sad and crap I get around it. Yes people, sad and crap is actual way to feel. Embrace it.
I'm not one for making resolutions because mostly I hate them. I think that they in general fail and that my time can be better spent sitting on the couch watching another endless set of NCIS or House reruns. Isn't Mark Harmon dreamy? He can build a boat in my basement anytime, and since I live in actual basement I guess that means he'd be building in my living room. Which might make me testy if said boat got in the way of the tv. Then again, Mark Harmon in my basement means I'd probably prefer to watch him instead of my tv.
And now that I've shared with you more than you'd ever like to know about my feelings for Mark Harmon I'll get back to blathering on about resolutions. Oddly though, I'm making one resolution this year. Deal with my goddamn mail problem. It piles up on the TV and the armoire and the pretty blue side table.
I HATE the mail, every day I get scads of it- none of interesting and the majority of it are bills. Ugly, hateful bills. 90% of which I pay online. This year I'm going to have them all stop sending me crap. I don't need those endless cable bills (kudos to me for having already signed up for paperless this morning). Recently I also lost my check register, I have no idea where it went off too but it's gone. Which is most annoying since I do try to keep my bills checking account balanced. In an effort to never lose it again I've downloaded a spread sheet that will calculate all that crap for me. I'm willing to take a short cut on the math portion since it never really was my strong suit. Having Excel do it for me is lovely.
On Friday I'm heading out to buy a paper shredder. Then all those pile of mail will be dust, or tiny bits of shredded paper. I will instantly feel lighter and freer. I won't be consumed with shame when I have people over that they are secretly judging me for piles of mail that I stead-fastly up till now have refused to deal with.
Oh holiday recap: There was a lot of ice on the way to Kentucky. I nearly got run over by a double-trailer Diet Coke Semi who was sliding on black ice. This resulted in me driving down the center median, off road style to avoid being crushed. Did you know that Honda Civics are totally built for off-roading? Because they totally are.
There was an epic 5 hour opening of presents at my sisters during which I was hellishly jealous of my nephew's new huge plasma tv. I want one. The rest of the time was spent eating copious amounts of food. In years past I've managed to avoid to stuffing myself to the point of sickness but this year was a failure. Because my mom, sister and I were the only ones cooking it was everything I liked. And thus I put everything in my mouth. Ugh. Then I caught some sort of bug once I got home and didn't eat for 2 days. I'm hoping it sort of helped move the scale back in the right direction. But I think I'll still be paying for it for a little while.