Changes are coming like a freight train

How does it happen that I've failed to write for so long? I can't explain it, I've started to write things countless time and then something stops me dead in my tracks (ooh, look at that shiny object over there...wanders away from the computer.)

But here I am again, writing another entry- hopefully to completion.

There is news in the land of the Saucy Trollop. Big news. I handed in my resignation at work and my last day will be May 28th.

Oh. My. God.

I'm heading back to school in the fall to get my teaching license and my masters. It's absolutely terrifying. And exciting. And then terrifying again.

The reason I'm leaving so soon is because my lease on my apartment is up on June 1st, and my new school is in Milwaukee. So for the time being I'll be tossing my stuff in storage for part of the summer and then staying with my parents in Cleveland and visiting my brother in Alabama too. I'm aiming for a August 1st arrival date in Milwaukee, which gives me three weeks before school starts to get settled in and find a damn job. I need to work, my student loans won't cover my living expenses and my classes are built in such a way that I don't have to be in class all day. Plus living in a cardboard box under a bridge would be fucking hard in the middle of winter which would be the result of me not finding a job.

This whole thing is a good thing, I've been needing a change for a while and I know in my heart it is the right move but that doesn't mean that without the slightest bit of provication that I don't burst into tears. Lots and lots of tears. I go in fits and starts, I'll be fine for a while and then all of the sudden it will hit me that I'm leaving this place I've called home for so very long. It's been 6.5 years that I've lived here as a non-college adult and then another 4 for undergrad so almost 11 years in total. My friends here are awesome, the community is amazing. It's impossibly hard to say goodbye to it all.

My poor, long suffering sister has had to bear the brunt of my crying. That woman deserves a bloody medal.

I've mentioned before when I get stressed my stomach goes haywire, I lose my appetite- sometimes I throw up. It is like it turns into a Celtic knot of discontent. I am fairly sure I thoroughly worried my parents this weekend because the sum total of my food that I consumed in their presence wouldn't keep a tit mouse alive (yes, I just said tit mouse- because I'm 13 and it's funny). For those who know me this is absolutely not my usual modus operandi. I love food. I love to eat. Granted earlier in the week I was eating everything that wasn't nailed down (thanks PMS), but on Thursday a switch flipped and poof! angry gut and no appetite.

Which is a pisser because my parents took me out to eat a totally awesome restaurant in Cleveland and I had maybe 5 bites of my amazingly delicious food. Do you live in Cleveland? Please go to Lopez on Lee and eat some of their Iron Chef Guacamole. It is absolutely to die for.

Christ the way this post is going everyone is going to have the impression that I'm not really excited about this move. But I am, I swear. Right now it's just the stress is foremost in my mind and thus taking up 90% of my computing power.

Milwaukee is awesome, the beer. The cheese. The people. A whole new world is waiting for me, and that is an amazing thing.

Just breathe.

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  • At May 03, 2010 8:41 PM, Blogger Lincoln said…

    We know each other only through the blogosphere but I am genuinely and eagerly excited for you. I understand the uneasiness and me. In reality, change kinda sucks....until it doesn't anymore and turns out to be awesome. Good luck.

  • At May 25, 2010 9:14 AM, Blogger Ian said…

    That's so exciting! You have once again proved that you are made of awesome. Good luck with the move and the job hunting. :)


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